Sometimes we need to just stop!

I recently created a visual journal page where I added the words “Sometimes we need to just stop”.  The stretched out arm of the lady on my page inspired the words.

I shared the picture with my visual journal friends and then received a phone call from one of them to ask me what exactly my thoughts were when choosing those words. Well, I honestly had no specific thoughts other than the fact that the stretched out hand reminded me of a “stop” hand signal.  The question posed by my dear friend, Renate Gombault, made me ponder the phrase which came to mind so spontaneously.

Is it not all about life being busy – very busy?!  We fulfill many different roles: mom, wife, friend, daughter, aunt, grandmother, colleague, employee, employer, business owner, encourager, confidante ….and so many more.

At night we fall down on our beds, either thinking of everything we did not get to do, or we pass out straight away – just to the hear the (@#$%) alarm clock go off a few hours (which feels like minutes only) later and do it all over again. Every day a rush, watching the clock, ticking the ‘to do’ list, adding to the ‘to do’ list, helping here, supporting there, trying to be everywhere and yet getting nowhere …nowhere near living a meaningful life, just being sucked up by the barrenness of a busy life!

So that is why we need to “sometimes just stop” – do a personal stock take.  Ask ourselves whether we are fulfilling our personal calling while being so busy?  Are we happy? Do we utilise and share our talents? Do we make time to fill our own ‘love cup’ so that we have enough to give to those who are in need of our care and support?  No, we don’t, because life’s too busy – there‘s no time for ‘me’!

A lady who lost her husband to suicide while her 4 children were still very small, shared her story on Radio CCFM.  To get her kids through school and university she had 3 jobs and somehow managed to cope.  Her answer to the question what her secret was for surviving this tough time in her life, was absolutely profound: “I had to look after myself first.  If I wasn’t ok, my children were not ok”.

So maybe, we need to just stop and start looking after ourselves, make time for ourselves, do something for ourselves …or at least reflect on how we can make our lives more meaningful!

This may not necessarily need lots of time or major changes, but perhaps small adjustments, a few minutes saved, minor changes …..challenge yourself to find a way to “just stop” now and then.

“ Never get so busy making a living, that you forget to make life”

 

SOMS MOET ONS NET STOP!

 Ek het onlangs ‘n bladsy in my visuele joernaal geskep waarby ek die woorde “Sometimes we need to just stop” gevoeg het.  Die uitgestrekte arm van die vroutjie op my bladsy het die woorde geinspireer.

Ek het die bladsy met my visuele joernaal vriendinne gedeel en kry toe ‘n oproep van een van hulle om te vra wat presies my gedagtes was toe ek daardie woorde gekies het.  Wel, ek het eerlikwaar geen gedagtes gehad behalwe dat die uitgestrekte hand my herinner het aan ‘n “stop” handgebaar nie.  Die vraag wat my dierbare vriendin, Renate Gombault, gevra het, het my laat nadink oor die frase wat so spontaan by my opgekom het.

Gaan dit nie alles oor ons lewe wat so besig is nie – baie besig is nie?!  Ons vervul vele verskillende rolle:  ma, vrou, vriendin, dogter, tannie, ouma, kollega, werknemer, werkgewer, besigheidseienaar, ondersteuner, vertroueling ….en soveel meer.

Saans val ons neer op ons beddens en dink óf aan alles wat ons nie gedoen gekry het nie, óf ons val onmiddellik aan die slaap – net om die (@#$%) alarm te hoor afgaan ‘n paar uur (wat slegs soos minute voel) later en alles weer oor te doen.  Elke dag ‘n gejaag, horlosie dophou, die “te doen” lysie afmerk, nog items by die lysie byvoeg, help hier, ondersteun daar, probeer oral wees en vorder met niks ….allermins met die leef van ‘n betekenisvolle lewe; ons word ingesluk deur die onbenulligheid van  ‘n besige lewe!

So dit is hoekom ons “somtyds net moet stop” – om ‘n persoonlike bestekopname te doen.  Om onsself af te vra of ons ons persoonlike roeping nastreef terwyl ons so besig is? Of ons gelukkig en vervuld is? Of ons ons talente gebruik en deel?  Of ons tydmaak om ons eie ‘liefdesbeker’ te vul sodat ons genoeg het om te deel met die wat omgee en ondersteuning nodig het?  Nee, ons doen nie, want die lewe is te besig – daar is geen tyd vir ‘my’ nie.

‘n Vrou wie se man selfmoord gepleeg het terwyl haar 4 kinders baie klein was, deel haar storie op Radio CCFM.  Om haar kinders deur die skool en universiteit te kry het sy op ‘n stadium 3 werke gehad en kry dit reg om op ‘n manier te oorleef. Haar antwoord of die vraag wat haar geheim was vir oorlewing in hierdie moeilike tyd van haar lewe, was verstommend:  “Ek moes eers na myself kyk.  As ek nie ‘ok’ was nie, was my kinders nie ‘ok’ nie.

So miskien moet ons net ‘n slag stop en na onsself begin kyk, tyd maak vir onsself, iets doen vir onsself ….of ten minste reflekteer en kyk hoe ons ons lewens meer betekenisvol kan maak!

Dit beteken nie noodwendig dat jy baie tyd nodig het, of groot veranderinge moet maak nie.  Dalk is dit klein aanpassings, ‘n paar minute te spaar, klein veranderinkies …. Daag jouself uit om ‘n manier te kry om af en toe “net te stop”!

“ Never get so busy making a living, that you forget to make life”

 

 

Advertisements